Most men shouldn’t be allowed to dress themselves let alone suggest what a woman should wear. But every once in a while I’ll stumble across an item of women’s clothing that makes me think, “I’d marry a girl on the spot if I saw her wearing that.” I call it #WifeMaterial.


I’d need a third hand to count the number of times I’ve seriously considered buying a pair of women’s shoes for myself. You see, sometimes, as a young fuccboi, during those years when you’re still growing into your full fuccboi self, you need your sneakers to stand-in as the confidence to your personality while the cruel world is busy shaping it. So you find yourself browsing yellow, purple or pink colorways that distract from your hopefully-dwindling insecurities. Many times, you’ll end up staring down a wild pair of kicks thinking, “Damn, these are cool,” while being subconsciously comforted by the idea of your peers’ attention being focused your feet and not, say, literally anything else about your appearance or what happens to be going on in your life.

That hadn’t happened to me in a few years, save for a light bone/sail grey pair of Nike Huaraches that don’t speak as much to my insecurities as they do of my increasingly desaturated wardrobe palette. But a week later, it happened again. I nearly pressed my face up against the glass and started licking when I walked past FEIT on Bowery and saw this pair of Hand Sewn Low leather shoes. Seriously, look at these things. It’s like someone took the Photoshop eyedropper and extracted the color of latte froth so perfect that The Lord (a Kanye/Future hybrid) himself would feel guilty letting it pass through his holy lips. My word. That mocha color alone is enough to get more than just a mouth wet. But then FEIT went ahead and made a damn hand-sewn, luxury leather version of a court sneaker with it and now I’m all “Hey, does this come in a Women’s 12?” and the FEIT associate is like, “Who are these for, your giant aunt?” What the hell, FEIT?

Someone, anyone—a female, preferably—please buy these. I will marry you, I will love you deeply for eternity, and I’ll damn sure make you keep these on when our children are conceived.

Images via feitdirect.com; Available here

Lucas Shanks is a writer and creative in New York City. If you want to marry him, you have to follow him on Twitter first.